E12: Are you playing small?

Are you really going all in for that dream or are you playing it small?

In today's episode we explore some of the reasons why we play it small and we talk about some of the strategies we can use to truly pursue the dream!

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Transcript

Hello & welcome to Dream Business Dream Life, helping ambitious people, like you, to grow a business they love.

I’m Emma Hine and I’m on a mission to show you that it is possible to grow a business without sacrificing your life.

Having experienced the rollercoaster of making millions of pounds, but feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and totally unsuccessful, I know first-hand the importance of growing a business on your terms.

On this podcast I'm going to share with you lots of tips and advice that will enable you to grow a business that gives you the financial freedom to live the life of your dreams while sharing with you some inspirational growth stories from other fabulous business owners.

Ready to live the dream? Then let’s get stuck in…

Hello & Welcome to today’s episode of Dream Business Dream Life.

Here is a question for you.

Are you really going for that dream or are you still playing it small?

I played it small for a long time; and in some ways I still am, and I see so many others doing it too. Yet if we want to live the dream; we have to stop it, we have to start playing it big!

So many of us find ourselves living lives that feel safe. We stick to what we know, follow well-trodden paths, and avoid risks. This tendency to "play it small" is deeply ingrained in who we are, but it comes at a significant cost. 

To live a truly fulfilling and happy life, we must be willing to take messy action and step outside our comfort zone. We must be willing to take risks and make scary decisions. We must be willing to do the work regardless of how hard it gets. 

Because it is only then that we can really start to build our dream business and live our dream life.

Now most of us that right yet we still do it. We still play small.

Why?

Fear.

We are often afraid what will happen if we fail, if we try and it does not work what will people think, how will life pan out if we do not get there or if something does not quite go to plan.

On the flip of that we are afraid of success, I mean if we do get to where we want to be it is a huge responsibility to keep us there and what if we get there and don’t like it.

We fear what others think.

We fear not being good enough or being seen as a fraud.

We fear we do not have enough knowledge.

We fear that people won’t like us.

We fear so much, and it plays a huge part in keeping us small.

We are afraid to do the thing we need to do so we don’t do anything, and we all know what happens when we don’t do anything…yep you got it nothing! Nothing happens; we stay still or maybe we go backwards.

We humans are creatures of habit, and we find comfort in the familiar. Our comfort zones provide a sense of security and predictability. We like the comfort zone. It feels safe so stepping outside of it can feel really scary and really uncomfortable, which means we often stay still; we change nothing and so nothing changes right.

Perfectionism is another reason we play small. The belief that we must do everything perfectly can lead to procrastination and avoidance. We wait for the "perfect" moment or until we feel fully prepared, which often means we never take action at all. 

Now there are lots of other reasons we play it small; it could be things we have been bought up to believe, like people in my family don’t do that, money makes people horrible people so why would you want any; you are not clever enough to do that.

But the reality is if we really want to build the dream business & live the dream life, we have to make it happen because it does not just happen magically.

We have to be prepared to do the things that will be scary; that may well be hard and uncomfortable as they are the things that make entrepreneurs different.

They are the things that will enable you to be one of the few people that actually build the dream.

So, let’s explore some of the things we can do to get us moving; to get us closer to that dream.

Taking messy action; yes, I am a strategist and yes, I encourage you to have a plan that tells you what to do, when and how to do it but whilst we learn and build that plan we have to be prepared to take messy action. 

If we wait for everything to be perfect or we wait for the perfect time we will be waiting forever.

But what you have to be prepared to do after taking messy action is to react quickly; to observe and listen to the feedback; to tweak, change and enhance it as you go. 

Now you hear me talk a lot about doing the thing that makes you feel uncomfortable; I believe that growth and comfort rarely coexist. I believe that growth happens the other side of your comfort zone.

Every time to do something new, something scary we are building our knowledge, we are building our strength, our capability, our resilience. We are pushing ourselves to the point where the next level becomes the new comfort zone….and that right there is growth.

Now let’s touch on this fear of failure…I strongly believe that failure is an inevitable part of any worthwhile journey. When we take messy action, we are likely to encounter setbacks and make mistakes and I think that is great.

Because these setbacks; these mistakes will help us to understand what doesn’t doesn’t work and take us one step closer to finding what does. If we start to think of failure as a learning process, we can start to overcome that fear of getting it wrong.

The sooner we get it wrong; the sooner we can get it right.

So, failure is a good thing, and we need to be prepared to fail. But when we fail, we need to need to make sure that we use it positively; that we take the learning and implement the changes then go again.

Will you get it right this time? Nobody can guarantee that, but I can guarantee that if you don’t try you will definitely not get it right.

Resilience is a key skill that successful business owners need and like any skill the more you practice it the better you get at it.

So strategically I guess the question is what should we be doing to stop ourselves from playing small?

Now a big part of it is mindset but there is also lots of things you can do strategically to help it feel less scary; less overwhelming and frankly more doable.

Start by getting very clear on what the ultimate goal is, get to know that dream inside out, you need real clarity on it. 

But that is the goal that is scary; that is the big one, the one that will take us right out of our comfort zone.

So, what I recommend you do is to break that big scary goal right down; into quarterly, monthly, weekly and even daily goals.

That way you can just focus on the smaller goal you need to do today and yes, at times that will still be scary but trust me it will be nowhere near as scary as the big ass one.

Smaller goals feel more achievable, they feel more doable and as you start to tick them off you are going to feel so much more motivated to keep going, to keep taking that step forward.

And do you know what before you know it you have achieved huge progress as lots of small steps soon add up to a big step.

And the more growth you get, the more you do the scary things the less scary they will start to feel.

I remember going live for the first time; I literally sat with sweaty palms, my mind on overdrive telling me I would be rubbish at it, I would forget what I was saying and people would think I am mad. 

And don’t get me started on my stokie accent…what would people think if I said book instead of book…cos that is what I do.

I had tonnes of notes that in itself was overwhelming, but I did it and yes it was far from perfect but so what; I did it.

Then I did it again and again and again and now I don’t even think about it; I just pop on and do my thing.

Having the right support system around you will also make a huge difference. And when I talk about support system, I don’t just mean your team, your family and your Friday night out friends, I also mean the right business support. 

Surrounding yourself with people who encourage and inspire you is one of the best strategies I can recommend. 

These can be people you invest in or people you simply build genuine connections with. People that become your cheerleaders; people that just get it when you have something you need to talk through or something you want to celebrate.

This business world can be pretty lonely at times and the people you spend your time with will help to keep you motivated, inspired and positive.

Don’t focus on getting yourself into the trendy rooms, focus on getting yourself into the rooms that are full of your people; the people that share your values, your passion and drive.

As Helen Keller said ‘Alone we can do so little. Together we can do so much’

Now some say that self-care is a mindset strategy, but I disagree I think it is an essential business strategy too. In fact, I think it is essential in any regard; life or business.

I hear so many people saying they don’t have time to go for a walk to clear their mind, or they can’t take a day off because they are too busy; self care is selfish, now I said those things for years too so I totally get it.

But, looking after ourselves physically and mentally is not a nice to have; it is something that we have to do because if we are not firing on all cylinders we will simply not give the business or our clients our all.

What happens when we get ill, physically or mentally? We have to take our foot of the pedal, we have to slow down, we have to cancel appointments and rejig our diaries, we cannot give the business our everything as we simply don’t have the strength or energy.

So, keeping ourselves in tip top shape is an essential part of making sure we do not play it small. Strategically book the time in your diary and make it happen.

Do not feel guilty for looking after yourself; your business needs you to do it.

And finally, don’t forget to keep celebrating those wins, not just the big ones, every win.

We all love a pat on the back for doing good so make sure you give yourself one.

The more you celebrate the more inspired you will be to do more.

Living a life of fulfilment and achieving our dreams requires us to stop playing small and start taking action. While the journey may be challenging, scary and filled with uncertainty, it is also rich with opportunities for growth, learning, and self-discovery. 

By allowing yourself to step outside of your comfort zone, to take the action you need to take, messy action and all, and to actively pursue that dream, you will not only allow yourself to live the dream but you will also inspire others to do the same. 

Remember, the path to success is not a straight line. It’s messy, unpredictable, and often filled with setbacks. But it’s also a path that leads to personal & business growth. So, take that first step, embrace the messiness, and dare to dream big. 

I promise your future self will thank you.

Thank you for listening; see you next time…

You have been listening to Dream Business Dream Life with Emma Hine. If you want to know more about how I can help you to build your dream business and your dream life, then visit my website emmehine.co.uk. Until next time remember you really can have it all